Therapy

So, I'm depressed. About the most I expected from my amateur musical "career" was a place to show my mediocre work and the Seattle Symphony stole that from me. My music will never be interesting to any significant orchestra. I am not allowed to merely have fun with it, and there's no way I can expect to be able to take myself as a "serious" composer. so what's the point.
So...here's a funny story that I first read in Barbara Tuchman's "Proud Tower" and am again reminded of in my reading of Norman Lebrecht.
Ricard Strauss was trying to conduct a rehearsal with a difficult singer. The singer, whose name escapes me, (Paula de Ahne, Or something similar) was being very difficult and stormed to her dressing room. Strauss followed her. Soon the other musicians heard tremendous yelling, screaming, bumping and other alarming noises from behind the closed door. They knocked and told Strauss taht if he wanted to fire her, they would be glad to support him in that action. Strauss stuck his head out of the room and informed them that "that would make me very sad, inasmuch as she has just consented to become my wife"
Life, love, irony, violence........see what I mean about the blues?

Another quote I found in Lebrecht's "Anecdotes";
"Busoni would ask;
"What's the difference between Godowsky and a pianola?
Godowsky can play ten times as fast but the pianola has ten times as much feeling.""
I guess you had to be there.
Pianola?
Godowsky?
I am truly sorry that this post is so lame, but I do have an excuse. I'm not sure what it is, but I'm sure I have one.