Monday, April 11, 2011

Bar fight


This is what really happened.
Not what the cops said.
Not what the lawyers made out of what the cops said.
And not what the judge said, which was based mainly on his own set of prejudices.

Coming home from my guitar lesson where I was studying how to play blues, I stopped at a bar for a drink and to sit for awhile. I parked my case at a table in the back and ordered a Guinness.
This guy comes up, he's drinking wine out of one of those long stem glasses.
He starts talking to me and asks me about my music. I told him I was just learning and couldn't play very well at all.
So he says "C'mon, I betcha you can play up a storm"
I begged off "No," I said "not really, I'm just learning"
"Yeah, yeah," he says, "don't mean to pressure you. Buy you a drink?"
"Sure"
We got to talking about guitars and music and stuff.
About three beers later he asks me again to play.
Three beers is right at the edge for me and I was kind of flattered that he would ask.
Mostly, for me, it's "Do you take requests?, how 'bout "stop playing?"
So I pulled out the guitar and hit some chords.
They sounded nice.
Nobody complained.
I had another beer.
Pretty soon I was wailin', really getting into it, the guy was smiling and everybody seemed to be enjoying it, so I just kept on, getting all creative and having a good time.
But soon the beer caught up with me and I started missing the strings and whatnot.
So I had to quit.
Got a nice bit of applause.
So I packed it up and told them I had to leave.
When I stood up, I realized I had had more than I usually drink.
Feeling kind of unstable, I asked for some coffee.
My wine drinking fan got up to leave, paid for all the drinks "thanks for the music", he said.
I sat for a while, drinking the coffee.
About a half hour later I felt better and tried to stand up, but I stumbled and fell face first into the wine glass on the table in front of me. The glass shattered and cut my face up and the stem shoved up into my cheek and jammed into my sinus.
Somebody called an ambulance and the bartender tried to stop the bleeding with a bar towel.
The doctor fixed me up. It wasn't really very serious.
I think it was the ambulance guys who assumed it was a fight, and they told the cops. The cops took it from there, they wanted to know who the other guy was, I couldn't tell them anything co I had to listen to a shitload of humiliating crap
from the judge.
At least I didn't get jailed.
Anyway,couple days, I went back to the bar and asked about the guitar.
They remembered me, saved it for me, and had it stored in the back.
I felt like buying the house a drink.
But it wasn't the same people.
And I only had five bucks on me.

17 Comments:

Blogger Doctor FTSE said...

Excellent! If I'd written this I'd be mighty pleased with myself. I made it 2 or 3 adverbs and about as many adjectives . . two signs of a real writer. Well structured. Drily funny. Real good read. Thanks.

4:46 AM  
Blogger Isabel Doyle said...

I enjoyed reading this very much - I wouldn't have finished if I didn't. Well done and thank you. Hope the sinus is all better now!

5:00 AM  
Blogger Lolamouse said...

This was an enjoyable read. I usually groan when I see something long, as many aren't very interesting, but this caught my attention at the get-go and kept it. It was dry, witty, and a bit sad. Nice job.

9:43 AM  
Blogger Helen said...

I agree .. you caught me with the first few lines .. I think all of us would enjoy hearing you play. Drinks are on me!

12:31 PM  
Blogger Glenn Buttkus said...

Stream of consciousness and
a slender thread of actuality
brews up to a creative concoction
of levity, sir. I LIKE IT!
As per usual, you make this writing
gig seem so effortless. I slave at
it and emerge with esoteric and
complicated wordscapes that
mostly seem to sadden and
baffle folks, but you, Christ,
you sail through it, gathering
guffaws as you go.

7:01 PM  
Blogger Tess Kincaid said...

This was an excellent write. You have a gift, my friend. Loved it.

3:34 PM  
Blogger Tumblewords: said...

Stellar piece of writing!!

9:46 PM  
Blogger Margaret said...

Reads almost as smoothly as that wine went down! :)

6:50 PM  
Blogger Trellissimo said...

Good one, Lane. Much to enjoy here.

10:35 AM  
Blogger Reflections said...

Great piece! Drew us in, filled the lines like melodies.

7:37 PM  
Blogger Lucy Westenra said...

Brilliant first line, with the implication that there's a whole other back-story. Natural story-telling.

1:12 PM  
Blogger Steve Isaak said...

Superb, darkish humor-intrinsic stuff. One of my favorite reads thus far.

2:03 PM  
Blogger Vinay said...

oh what a fantastic narration! :D I totally like this story! and a great way to start off the tale too.

My Magpie Post

10:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hallo, Lane!

I was told by a wise savant not to believe what is in this blog is true.
Tschüß,
Anonomann

6:51 AM  
Blogger Lane Savant said...

It is true in a way.
In another way it is the story of my experience with the SSO.

11:11 AM  
Blogger Promising Poets Parking Lot said...

love it,
bravo, you are super smart.

bless your talent and life.

12:07 PM  
Blogger Promising Poets Parking Lot said...

beautiful write…

Invite you to join poets rally week 42 by sharing a free verse today.

You will love the encouragements you get once you are in and make commitment.

Your poetry rocks!

awards for you!


Hope to see you in!
Have A Blessed Easter!
xxx

12:07 PM  

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