A miserable ride
After cleaning out the basement a little bit this morning, I decided that since it was a miserable day and I was (still am) in a pissy mood, why not go for a bike ride.
Just a little 30 miler to Q.A. Starbucks and back.
O.K. to almost there where I decided rather than slog all the way up 3rd west, I would walk through the park (it has a name but I don't care about that) still 15.5 miles out, it was.
Coffee, P.B. Cookie (I wish they didn't have cute diminutive name, makes me feel like some 5 year old asking for one)
The trip back started out O.K. 'cause it was down 3rd west at a nice speed, but I was knackered at the 20 mile mark (U.W.Campus)(I don't like that word "Campus, seems kind of "gooey, know what I mean?)(not as bad as syllabus, where did they ever come up with that? Unless its a freudian slip on the word "silly" that, I can buy)
So the trip home was awful only partially because it coincided with my usual nap time.
So, I'm home and, reluctant as I am to say anything that might be construed to be "positive" the new bike shorts were comfortable and really kept down the chafing.
So that made it less worse.
Miles, 31.3
Time, 2:57:19
Avg. spd. 10.5 (I did a lot of walking.)
Top speed 37.4
Total accumulated mileage 721
I hate physical exercise.
I hate mental exercise.
I hate typing.
I hate thinking.
My political predictions.
Gas prices will continue to go down till the election.
Osama Bin Laden will issue another video threatening us with horrible things.
The people who Gene Wilder described so well in "Blazing Saddles" (i.e. Morons) will piss their pants and splatter it around with their quivering knees and vote for McCain so we can have four more years of this B&D form of government.
The Demos (a demo is a practice product that is never meant to actually go into production) will find some way to lose, lose, lose.
Just like the L.A.D.A (isn't that a brand of soap?) managed to lose the O.J. case because their little knees were quivering in fear that if they convicted him the black population would riot or something.
So they shot the case in the foot and took a dive.
Apparently they couldn't tell the difference between 26 cops beating the crap out of an unarmed doofus and someone slicing up a couple of innocent (?) folks.
It's the smog.
The lead attorney on that one got a 30K reward, so she must have delivered what she was supposed to deliver.
and, while I'm at it I get about 50 hits a day here and only 2 of you ever leave comments (I'm not counting the imaginary folks, they are some of my best friends)
Ummm.......Gas prices, pollution, idiotic politicians, Doofuses, morons,
Screw it that's enough for today.
Meredith is downstairs listening to the speeches, "inspiring" stuff, like "ecstasy" inspires.
Like Heroin inspires.
Like a good drunk inspires.
Just look out for the hangover.
It'll be your children starving to death in the streets waiting for the cops to come along and taze them for not getting out of the way fast enough.
Well, that apparently wasn't enough for today.
Just a little 30 miler to Q.A. Starbucks and back.
O.K. to almost there where I decided rather than slog all the way up 3rd west, I would walk through the park (it has a name but I don't care about that) still 15.5 miles out, it was.
Coffee, P.B. Cookie (I wish they didn't have cute diminutive name, makes me feel like some 5 year old asking for one)
The trip back started out O.K. 'cause it was down 3rd west at a nice speed, but I was knackered at the 20 mile mark (U.W.Campus)(I don't like that word "Campus, seems kind of "gooey, know what I mean?)(not as bad as syllabus, where did they ever come up with that? Unless its a freudian slip on the word "silly" that, I can buy)
So the trip home was awful only partially because it coincided with my usual nap time.
So, I'm home and, reluctant as I am to say anything that might be construed to be "positive" the new bike shorts were comfortable and really kept down the chafing.
So that made it less worse.
Miles, 31.3
Time, 2:57:19
Avg. spd. 10.5 (I did a lot of walking.)
Top speed 37.4
Total accumulated mileage 721
I hate physical exercise.
I hate mental exercise.
I hate typing.
I hate thinking.
My political predictions.
Gas prices will continue to go down till the election.
Osama Bin Laden will issue another video threatening us with horrible things.
The people who Gene Wilder described so well in "Blazing Saddles" (i.e. Morons) will piss their pants and splatter it around with their quivering knees and vote for McCain so we can have four more years of this B&D form of government.
The Demos (a demo is a practice product that is never meant to actually go into production) will find some way to lose, lose, lose.
Just like the L.A.D.A (isn't that a brand of soap?) managed to lose the O.J. case because their little knees were quivering in fear that if they convicted him the black population would riot or something.
So they shot the case in the foot and took a dive.
Apparently they couldn't tell the difference between 26 cops beating the crap out of an unarmed doofus and someone slicing up a couple of innocent (?) folks.
It's the smog.
The lead attorney on that one got a 30K reward, so she must have delivered what she was supposed to deliver.
and, while I'm at it I get about 50 hits a day here and only 2 of you ever leave comments (I'm not counting the imaginary folks, they are some of my best friends)
Ummm.......Gas prices, pollution, idiotic politicians, Doofuses, morons,
Screw it that's enough for today.
Meredith is downstairs listening to the speeches, "inspiring" stuff, like "ecstasy" inspires.
Like Heroin inspires.
Like a good drunk inspires.
Just look out for the hangover.
It'll be your children starving to death in the streets waiting for the cops to come along and taze them for not getting out of the way fast enough.
Well, that apparently wasn't enough for today.
posted by Lane Savant at 5:49 PM
2 Comments:
Now, that is what I am talking about--a Palmer rant that segues like a sombitch, and makes chicanes and twists and turns like a ferret with its ass on fire.
The Fidelio adventure did sound a bit tame this time, but it is good, very good to know that you new biking shorts keep the chafing down; nothing like a good abrasive crotch and ass chafing to finish off one's day, enit?
The four things you mention that you "hate", physical exercise, mental exercise, typing, and thinking....just happen to be the four things you spend an inordinate amount of time doing every single day of your retirement. Ironic. You did not mention hating the SSO, masterbation, home chores, yardwork, composing, mastication, car repairing, Thai food, or ass picking. You can leave those for another posting on a different day I suppose.
For our vocabulary lesson today, kiddies, we have "knackered", a British term meaning "to kill, tired, or exhausted", a derivative of knacker: a buyer of worn out domestic animals or their carcasses to use for animal food or fertilizer.
As to the LANE SAVANT POLITICAL PREDICTIONS:
1. Yeah, I agree gas prices will continue to plummet until after Thanksgiving, and then for a Christmas present, it will magically leap above 4 bucks a gallon again.
2. As to Osama Bin Laden, many of us felt that Bush Jr. would have produced him or his corpse to cinch the last election; but no, he found another way to steal it like the Fascist cocksucker that he is.
3. I am concerned as well, that the right winged John Birch KKK morons, the super patriots, and knee jerk conservatives, will, after the next Bin Laden DVD is released (I think the Republicans have a library of those and just release them when they want to manipulate the population and create chaos)---not vote for Barrack Obamsa, and we will get four more years of death in Iraq, high gas prices, tax cuts for the rich, and horseshit for the masses. "Let them eat grits," George W. says, grinning like an oldster that has just cut the most bodacious fart in the world and only he is enjoying its pungentness.
4. You could not be more WRONG that to point your agued digit at the Democrats and beller,"They will find a way to lose the election." They won the popular vote in the last two elections. It was only the Fascist Republican double dealing rigged election shenanigans that "stole" the Presidency both times. Black votes not counted, hanging chads, brother Jeb Bush rigging Florida for the cinch vote.
5. As to the Juice, O.J. was and is guilty as sin. And you are bang on with your comment relative to the lily livered chicken shitted judicial system that would not nail his arrogant ass to a jailhouse floor. Clarence Thomas was another guilty as sin sonofabitch who got off, sporting his arrogance, and being rewarded for his transgressions.
6. Hey, 50 hits a day is cool. Is there a counter I can look at for FFTR? Yeah, for a while now, only Anonomann and Myself are the loyalists and sychophants for Sir Savant. Perhaps my verbosity and verve frightens away other comments. That would be sad.
7. As to political speeches, usually they are 95% bullshit and 5% good intentions, but Obama can deliver a speech like no other politican, lawyer, or actor ever has. He does inspire. Who knows if he can deliver. Does any President truly deliver. Kennedy tried, and the powers that be fragged his butt.
Glenn
A counter, yeah, coming up.
Speeches are advertising.
Or, at best, entertainment.
Like Religion promising "peace" if you are willing to go to war for it.
Or "freedom" if you are willing to follow orders.
I didn't bother to mention all those other things I hate because I hate mentioning them.
I spend inordinate amounts of time because I have inordinate amounts of time.
tune in to the next post for more infantile gibberish
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